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I am the Grade Fairy and stop giggling when I say that.
GF: Hellooo. Hello. Hi. Hey, you.
Chuck: What?
GF: It"s Me. Actually it is I. Predicate nominative after an intransitive verb. I am the grade fairy.
Chuck: Dude.
GF: Here to talk about your grades.
Chuck: Dude. I need you to get off my chest.
GF: Sorry. But I am the grade fairy
Chuck: I keep hearing that. Who let you in here?
GF: No one had to let me in. I'm a fairy.
Chuck: I never actually heard anyone just up and admit that.
GF: Like the tooth fairy. No one has to let the tooth fairy in.
Chuck: I don't actually believe in the tooth fairy
GF: ouch. Ed's not going to like that much.
Chuck: Who is ed?
GF: Oh, that's the real name of the tooth fairy. Ed Hendrickson. Ed. Eddy, really. We all call him Eddy.
Chuck: This has been fun but I really need to get some sleep.
GF: Yes, yes, you do. Sleep is very important for getting good grades. Sleep is the thing.
Chuck: So, let yourself out.
GF: Indeed I will. After we have a little conference about your grades.
Chuck: Can I just talk to you at school? Mr. Fairy?
GF: I understand your reluctance to talk about this. It's difficult. We invest so much in school- in being a good student. It's hard to talk about.
Chuck: It's just hard to talk about when a 10 inch dude is sitting on my chest.
GF: We all make excuses like that.
Chuck: But there really is a 10 inch dude on my chest.
GF: ok. Look, how do YOU feel about your grades?
Chuck: I'm ok. I get As. I do okay. Everyone is happy.
GF: But I am here to talk about YOU.
Chuck: I think I could do better.
GF: Aha!
Chuck: Aha what, man? I just said I think we could do better.
GF: Aha again! You think that As aren't good enough.
Chuck: Well, just in certain places.
GF: What do you mean?
Chuck: Well, I know that I'm pretty smart in certain areas.
GF: smarter than an A?
Chuck: Well, the As don't mean too much. Like in Biology. I'm killer in Biology. All I can get is an A. It doesn't mean that much.
GF: So sometimes an A isn't so good?
Chuck: Well, it's not like it's not good. It's just that it doesn't mean what I think it should mean. Biology is fun.
GF: How about this C over here?
Chuck: Where'd you get that?
GF: The grade fairy gets all report cards.
Chuck: Isn't there some kind of privacy law or something?
GF: Yeah, not so much.
Chuck: I don't know how I feel about that
GF: I'm a fairy, chuck. You really need to wrap your head around this
Chuck: I got that C in English. I'm kinda hurting in English
GF: Well, who can blame you. It's a tough language. I hear the Chinese have a particularly difficult time learning it.
Chuck: yeah, but I was kind of born here.
GF: Don't sweat it. So was I, but I still have that crazy fairy accent.
Chuck: Yeah, I try pretty hard but it's never higher than a C in English.
GF: So you're trying really hard?
Chuck: really hard. Can you move your foot a little? It's on my trachea.
GF: Sorry. Didn't see it. And you are trying just as hard as you do in Biology?
Chuck: Actually, harder. Bio is easy for me. I keep thinking I'm gonna be a doctor. I suppose I have to pass English to be one, but it's hard to imagine I'm gonna have to diagram a sentence.
GF: True. The C bugs you, though, doesn't it?
Chuck: How do you know?
GF: Do I have to go into detail again about who I am?
Chuck: No. I get it. Yeah, it really does bother me. I kill myself just for that stupid C
GF: Tell you what I'm going to do, then.
Chuck: Wow. How did we get in the kitchen?
GF: More magic fairy stuff. Have a seat.
Chuck: Can I grab you an oreo?
GF: Ooh, yeah. I love those. The little ones? Sweet.
Chuck: Milk is in the fridge
GF: Do you have any tiny cups?
Chuck: hm. Not really. Just use the milk bottle cap
GF: Hey. You ARE smart
Chuck: Not in English. I"m an English idiot.
GF: Ah. But here is why we are in the kitchen.
Chuck: What are you doing?
GF: Watch and learn, Chuck.
Chuck: Are you cutting up my report card?
GF: I'm taking a little license. Grab me one of those stars.
Chuck: ok, I don't know how you use those scissors. They're like giant on you.
GF: Just use both hands. And... here we go.
Chuck: hey, why did you cut out the C?
GF: Nice, eh? Check this.
Chuck: You can't hang that up on the fridge.
GF: Who says? I'm the Grade Fairy. I pretty much have complete authority over grades here.
Chuck: I don't want people to see that. I'm not a C student.
GF: I guess I'm just trying to make a point.
Chuck: What, that I'm stupid?
GF: Actually the other point. It's like this. Let's say you're a mountain climber. For a living. You climb mountains.
Chuck: ok, mountain climber.
GF: Now, let's say there's a little mountain in your neighborhood.
Chuck: How little?
GF: Just a few feet high. Nothing serious. You climb it all the time. Everyone you know knows you can climb it.
Chuck: ok. Little mountain. Got it.
GF: It's easy for you to climb it. You get an A every time you try. You barely have to get out of bed to climb it.
Chuck: I think I see where you're going with this
GF: Even you admit that the A doesn't mean that much.
Chuck: I'll agree with that.
GF: In fact, that A doesn't even belong on your fridge. You know you can do it. You can't lose.
Chuck: But the bigger mountain down the block...
GF: Exactly. The one you know you can't climb. That one- every time you try, you only get halfway up. But maybe you get a little farther every time.
Chuck: And I keep trying
GF: And you keep trying. But you still only get a C for it. You get only part way up.
Chuck: That's how I feel about English.
GF: That's your bigger mountain. You put the effort into it. That A was easy but this C? This stands for you making yourself better. It means you picked the big mountain and fought your way up.
Chuck: I guess so. That's how I feel in English class.
GF: it's your big mountain. You earned that grade, but you're ashamed of it because it's just a C.
Chuck: I see what you're saying. A C on the big mountain that I work for...
GF: ...is worth an A on the little mountain- the one you got easily.
Chuck: I guess I did work pretty hard for that C. I wish my parents thought that way.
GF: Do they know what the mountains look like?
Chuck: What do you mean?
GF: Do they know how big that mountain is? You might be afraid to tell them. Afraid of looking stupid. But the truth is, everyone has bigger and smaller mountains.
Chuck: I should talk to them.
GF: After you get me more of these baby oreos.
Chuck: Did you eat that whole bag?
GF: Did you learn something?
Chuck: I guess so...
GF: Then get off my back about the cookies, ok?
Chuck: I'm just saying because someone's gonna notice the whole bag gone.
GF: Why don't you take that new communication with your parents and explain about the fairy?
Chuck: That's probably not going to work much
GF: So maybe I'll just take this bag, too, right? We'll call it a learning experience.
Chuck: What?
GF: It"s Me. Actually it is I. Predicate nominative after an intransitive verb. I am the grade fairy.
Chuck: Dude.
GF: Here to talk about your grades.
Chuck: Dude. I need you to get off my chest.
GF: Sorry. But I am the grade fairy
Chuck: I keep hearing that. Who let you in here?
GF: No one had to let me in. I'm a fairy.
Chuck: I never actually heard anyone just up and admit that.
GF: Like the tooth fairy. No one has to let the tooth fairy in.
Chuck: I don't actually believe in the tooth fairy
GF: ouch. Ed's not going to like that much.
Chuck: Who is ed?
GF: Oh, that's the real name of the tooth fairy. Ed Hendrickson. Ed. Eddy, really. We all call him Eddy.
Chuck: This has been fun but I really need to get some sleep.
GF: Yes, yes, you do. Sleep is very important for getting good grades. Sleep is the thing.
Chuck: So, let yourself out.
GF: Indeed I will. After we have a little conference about your grades.
Chuck: Can I just talk to you at school? Mr. Fairy?
GF: I understand your reluctance to talk about this. It's difficult. We invest so much in school- in being a good student. It's hard to talk about.
Chuck: It's just hard to talk about when a 10 inch dude is sitting on my chest.
GF: We all make excuses like that.
Chuck: But there really is a 10 inch dude on my chest.
GF: ok. Look, how do YOU feel about your grades?
Chuck: I'm ok. I get As. I do okay. Everyone is happy.
GF: But I am here to talk about YOU.
Chuck: I think I could do better.
GF: Aha!
Chuck: Aha what, man? I just said I think we could do better.
GF: Aha again! You think that As aren't good enough.
Chuck: Well, just in certain places.
GF: What do you mean?
Chuck: Well, I know that I'm pretty smart in certain areas.
GF: smarter than an A?
Chuck: Well, the As don't mean too much. Like in Biology. I'm killer in Biology. All I can get is an A. It doesn't mean that much.
GF: So sometimes an A isn't so good?
Chuck: Well, it's not like it's not good. It's just that it doesn't mean what I think it should mean. Biology is fun.
GF: How about this C over here?
Chuck: Where'd you get that?
GF: The grade fairy gets all report cards.
Chuck: Isn't there some kind of privacy law or something?
GF: Yeah, not so much.
Chuck: I don't know how I feel about that
GF: I'm a fairy, chuck. You really need to wrap your head around this
Chuck: I got that C in English. I'm kinda hurting in English
GF: Well, who can blame you. It's a tough language. I hear the Chinese have a particularly difficult time learning it.
Chuck: yeah, but I was kind of born here.
GF: Don't sweat it. So was I, but I still have that crazy fairy accent.
Chuck: Yeah, I try pretty hard but it's never higher than a C in English.
GF: So you're trying really hard?
Chuck: really hard. Can you move your foot a little? It's on my trachea.
GF: Sorry. Didn't see it. And you are trying just as hard as you do in Biology?
Chuck: Actually, harder. Bio is easy for me. I keep thinking I'm gonna be a doctor. I suppose I have to pass English to be one, but it's hard to imagine I'm gonna have to diagram a sentence.
GF: True. The C bugs you, though, doesn't it?
Chuck: How do you know?
GF: Do I have to go into detail again about who I am?
Chuck: No. I get it. Yeah, it really does bother me. I kill myself just for that stupid C
GF: Tell you what I'm going to do, then.
Chuck: Wow. How did we get in the kitchen?
GF: More magic fairy stuff. Have a seat.
Chuck: Can I grab you an oreo?
GF: Ooh, yeah. I love those. The little ones? Sweet.
Chuck: Milk is in the fridge
GF: Do you have any tiny cups?
Chuck: hm. Not really. Just use the milk bottle cap
GF: Hey. You ARE smart
Chuck: Not in English. I"m an English idiot.
GF: Ah. But here is why we are in the kitchen.
Chuck: What are you doing?
GF: Watch and learn, Chuck.
Chuck: Are you cutting up my report card?
GF: I'm taking a little license. Grab me one of those stars.
Chuck: ok, I don't know how you use those scissors. They're like giant on you.
GF: Just use both hands. And... here we go.
Chuck: hey, why did you cut out the C?
GF: Nice, eh? Check this.
Chuck: You can't hang that up on the fridge.
GF: Who says? I'm the Grade Fairy. I pretty much have complete authority over grades here.
Chuck: I don't want people to see that. I'm not a C student.
GF: I guess I'm just trying to make a point.
Chuck: What, that I'm stupid?
GF: Actually the other point. It's like this. Let's say you're a mountain climber. For a living. You climb mountains.
Chuck: ok, mountain climber.
GF: Now, let's say there's a little mountain in your neighborhood.
Chuck: How little?
GF: Just a few feet high. Nothing serious. You climb it all the time. Everyone you know knows you can climb it.
Chuck: ok. Little mountain. Got it.
GF: It's easy for you to climb it. You get an A every time you try. You barely have to get out of bed to climb it.
Chuck: I think I see where you're going with this
GF: Even you admit that the A doesn't mean that much.
Chuck: I'll agree with that.
GF: In fact, that A doesn't even belong on your fridge. You know you can do it. You can't lose.
Chuck: But the bigger mountain down the block...
GF: Exactly. The one you know you can't climb. That one- every time you try, you only get halfway up. But maybe you get a little farther every time.
Chuck: And I keep trying
GF: And you keep trying. But you still only get a C for it. You get only part way up.
Chuck: That's how I feel about English.
GF: That's your bigger mountain. You put the effort into it. That A was easy but this C? This stands for you making yourself better. It means you picked the big mountain and fought your way up.
Chuck: I guess so. That's how I feel in English class.
GF: it's your big mountain. You earned that grade, but you're ashamed of it because it's just a C.
Chuck: I see what you're saying. A C on the big mountain that I work for...
GF: ...is worth an A on the little mountain- the one you got easily.
Chuck: I guess I did work pretty hard for that C. I wish my parents thought that way.
GF: Do they know what the mountains look like?
Chuck: What do you mean?
GF: Do they know how big that mountain is? You might be afraid to tell them. Afraid of looking stupid. But the truth is, everyone has bigger and smaller mountains.
Chuck: I should talk to them.
GF: After you get me more of these baby oreos.
Chuck: Did you eat that whole bag?
GF: Did you learn something?
Chuck: I guess so...
GF: Then get off my back about the cookies, ok?
Chuck: I'm just saying because someone's gonna notice the whole bag gone.
GF: Why don't you take that new communication with your parents and explain about the fairy?
Chuck: That's probably not going to work much
GF: So maybe I'll just take this bag, too, right? We'll call it a learning experience.
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