Switched-On Magazine

Communicating with your loved ones is very important
for a healthy up bringing, although it doesn"t exist
in all families. Open communication at times starts off
good in the beginning of your childhood, when you
would go to your parents and tell them everything,
then later on you enter middle school and you didn't
feel that you could share as much with them. When
they asked how your day was, you shrug and ignore
them. But when it comes to tough problems you are
having with friends and in school, it starts to become
harder to talk to them about it. Keeping healthy open
lines of communication between your parents and your
siblings will help you lead a happier life. But why
is it sometimes so hard to do? There are many
reasons. So, here are five ways that can help your
communication improve.

1. Keep Your Ears Open.
The first thing you do when your parents start to talk
to you, especially when it sounds like a lecture, is
to stop listening. Try and ?keep your ears open? and
listen to what they say. Don't respond back right
away, take in what they are saying and process through
it before you respond. This way you don't interrupt
them which can lead to a fight, and you are completely
understanding what they are telling you, which can
bypass miscommunication problems.

2. Location, Location, Location
When you want to talk to your parents about an
important decision, like wanting to become an exchange
student in Bangladesh next year, don't bring it up to
them while in the check out line of a grocery store.
Let them know first that you have something that is
important to you and would like to talk to them about
it. Plan a place that you can all sit down and have a
discussion. Choosing the right place to have
conversations can lead to a more successful
conversation in the end.


3. Stay Cool
Have you ever tired having a conversation with a
sibling who just irritated you so much you wanted to
scream and probably did? Well, trying to 'stay Cool?
in a conversation sounds a lot easier then it is.
Before the conversation can go from fun to failure,
you will need to learn to listen and respond in a calm
matter. Even if you do not agree with what the other
person is saying, there is no need to raise your voice
and get excited. This way no point is being heard.
Instead, listen to what the other person says, take a
second to comprehend it, and then give your point.
'staying Cool?, will allow you to maintain a healthy
conversation because it doesn't allow the other person
to become upset with you and in the end, you hear what
each other has to say.

4. Certain Topics, Certain Times
Not only can communication be hard for teenagers, but
it can be just as hard for parents, especially when it
comes to topics like, sex and drugs. Many parents
would probably like to skip these conversations, but
they are the conversations that are the most
important. Although it can be hard and even
uncomfortable to have these conversations with your
parents, there are ways to make it easier. Use
references if you have a question that you feel
uncomfortable talking about. Like through movie or TV
characters. ? Do you think that Seth on The O.C. was
old enough to have sex with his girlfriend?? This can
make it a bit more comfortable to engage in a
conversation about an uncomfortable topic. You could
also have your parents and you write questions down
and them draw them out of a hat, so that they seem
more anonymous. After having your first uncomfortable
conversation with your parents, you will see them
become easier.

5. If all else fails there's always Email.
Why is it that you will email your friends ten times a
day, but would never consider sending your parents
one? Well, being a teen can be really hard, and
sometimes you just don't have the patience that you
need to have good communication with your family. So,
try sending them an email. Sometimes writing things
down can be a huge relief, you can get it all out with
out any interruptions, and re-read it to make sure
it's exactly what you intended to say. You may find
that you can have very open communication with your
loved ones through email. Which may lead to great
verbal communication later on. So, send your parents
an email and await what they have to say!