Switched-On Magazine

Although as teens we may not always know what we want out of life, or even how to achieve it, we can be sure that parents will always be there to give some semblance of guidance to our shaky hands as we reach out to act. Sadly, there's no uniform strength that they have to use to keep us on track, and so the amount of direction they have over our choices, beliefs, can range from a light touch that guides your way from afar to a firm grip that holds your hand through everything, whether you want it to or not, the pressure intense. Believe it or not, it seems that having too much faith in someone can be even rougher on them than not having any in them at all, given the circumstances.

For the most part a parent's expectations, and the pressures we feel to make sure that we meet them, can actually be beneficial, if they've got the right goal in mind. It's been said before: parents only want what's best for us. So, why shouldn't they be able to prod us in the right direction? That is, why shouldn't we strive to meet their expectations? Plenty of reasons. Perhaps you feel they're too absurd or farfetched; or maybe they're not high enough and you'd be degrading yourself to aim so low? I think the pressure comes from the view that we have of ourselves and our abilities. Just as someone trying their hardest wouldn't want to accept the mediocre, or how someone knowingly slacking off wouldn't want to be praised for something not done wholeheartedly, it helps when the parents' expectations match those that you have for yourself. There's nothing wrong with being guided, but the destination does matter, and teens should have a say in it.

A lot of parents speak of "plans", life goals that you've agreed to achieve, to have a safety net. Often times however it seems as if they're attempting to achieve their own dreams through you. We've all seen it before, fictional or not: continuing the "family business"; becoming a failed star's second chance at their 15 minutes, and everything in between. Where would the fairness be if everyone was to be an extension of their parents? I think that expectations should be there as guidelines but in no way should they shape every single action you take, no matter the pressure you feel. Everyone knows their own potential; whether or not they acknowledge it though, I think that should be up to them. Excelling in academics or extracurricular activities isn't the only way to lead a successful life.